Bad day at Hotch
by Evildarkwolf
Summary: Hotch returns after being hurt. But maybe he should have stayed in bed. For nothing goes right for him from the moment he drives to work. And soon the rest of the team will find trouble. A silly story. Please read and review.
1. Why me

**AN/ This is my first CM story. Please leave me a review. I tried really hard. This is meant to be funny. I really hope you guys like it. Please tell me what you think. **

Aaron Hotchner was driving to the BAU after his weekend with his wife. He was only half glad to be going back to work. His last case was just awful, he and his other two colleges had the worst luck. He wasn't even sure if he should even return to work so soon since he was still healing.

He was about to park in his normal spot but there was already a car there. "Damn." When he looked for another one he had no luck the only one left was a spot farthest from the building that no one else would want. "Just my kind of day."

He got out of the car and started to walk toward the tall building when he felt something soft under his foot. He looked down and was horrified, he lifted his foot and smeared all over the bottom was shit. Icky runny dark brown and green shit. "Who in their right mind would let their dog crap on the sidewalk!?"

Then he pushed the button for the elevator and waited for it to open. He leaned against the door and reached down examined the damage. Then the door opened and he took his hand off the wall and felt something sticky and looked at his palm and there was a big glob of sticky gum. "What the? This day just went from bad to worse."

When the elevator got to his floor he started to walk towards his office in a very grumpy mood. He almost got to his office when he started to feel dizzy. "oh oh." Once the dizziness went away he went on with his day. He was only in his office for 20 minutes when JJ came in with a folder.

"Sir, there's a new case."

Hotch took a quick look at the case file. "Alright. Get the team for a press conference."

JJ stood at a board of photo's and told all that she knew about the victim. "This is Dean Walters." She pointed to a man with dark hair. "He was tied up to a board and tortured for days before the unsub drove a stake through his heart. All the other victims all died the same way. 7 men disappeared all in one month, and it had been going on for 5 months. But only one man from the 7 have been found the other 6 have never been seen again. So we have 5 dead and 30 still missing."

"A stake?" Came Mogan's voice. "Do the cops have a lead on the unsub who did it?"

JJ shook her head. "No. But there was a hairbrush at the crime scene."

"So the unsub is either a girl or Dean had a girl with him." They all looked at Reid. "What? I'm just saying. You know he might have….." Seeing the looks he was receiving he looked down and shut up.

"Any way, I already called the head Chief that was on the scene and told him that we were coming. And other than that we have no leads. We will be informed by the chef when we get there. "

"Good job JJ. Alright team, meet at the jet in 20." Hotch started to feel light headed again and grabbed his ribs. He wished they would just heal already, he forgot his pills at home and Haley had a home remedy for things like hurt ribs.

"You alright Hotch?" Gideon said as he placed a hand on Hotch's shoulder.

"Yeah, my ribs just still hurt a little bit. I'll be ok."

"You sure?" Hotch nodded and Gideon nodded and left.

Hotch grabbed his ready bag and headed out of the room and walked down the stairs and started to sway. He grabbed onto Emmy's desk hoping that the fuzziness in his head would go away. But once his did the room around him started to spin and the edges darken. The last thing he saw was JJ spilling a cup of coffee all over Morgan's desk.

Reid was close by and saw him go down. "Hotch!" He ran over to him and kneeled down. "Hotch?" He turned him on his back.

Gideon jogged over and told JJ to call 911. "Aaron? He's having trouble breathing!" He tugged on Hotch's tie and took it off and started to unbutton his shirt a little bit.

"What is that?" Reid pointed to a black thing showing on Hotch's chest.

Gideon unbuttoned it some more and his eyes widened. "What is that?!"

Morgan came over and looked down. "What the hell happened?" Then he saw it to. "What's that?"

JJ came over. "There on their way….Wait. Is that a….a corset?"

**AN/Please hit that button! that one at the bottom, that says review...you can't miss it. Review. :) It will make me very happy. If you do I will send you a cookie and some Chocolate!**


	2. Telling

A/N Thanks to the ones who reviewed on this. It meant a lot. I know this is not very long but it will have to do. I hope its funny.

Emily came over to see what JJ was talking about. "A corset?" She looked down at Hotch. "Wow. What's he doing with one of those?" Her and JJ were trying there hardest to hold back there laughs.

"Maybe he thought that they would make his ribs hurt less? You know, squeeze them numb." Reid received all kinds of funny looks from his team. "What?....Never mind."

Morgan saw Hotch's eyes beginning to open. "Hotch?"

"Nug." Came from a Hotch with his eyes open in slits.

"You alright man?"

"Yeah, help me up."

They did and he looked down at himself. Turning bright red he closed his shirt. "I can explain that."

"That would be nice." Morgan said trying to be nice.

Hotch started to tell his story.

(Flash back)

It had started last night when he came home and found his wife dressed in a dominatrix outfit swinging a short whip. "Hi honey, I've been reading an article in a magazine, about roll playing and bringing back the fun into sex. So I bought us both something to play in. There's yours." She points to the sofa where a few things lay waiting. Hotch's jaw dropped as he looked at his straight laced wife dressed that way. She was more the type who would dress like June Cleaver from Leave it to Beaver, not this. He felt himself getting hot as he gazed at her push up bra outfit, the leather was hot! He grabbed at the stuff she had laid out and ran to the bathroom.

Minutes later he came out holding the shirt to his chest. "This is not a me. I mean look at this." He dropped it to the flow and she smiled at the tight corset incasing his chest.

"You are going to get it Mister….come here." She cracks the whip. He smiled at her. "I'm not wearing any collar though."

Hotch came back from his memories of the night before as he rubbed his hand across the corset. "That is all you guys need to know. She said it would help my ribs that aren't healed and they have. I just forgot to take it off."

Morgan smirked. "I can't see it, you and your wife acting like that…Kinky! That's more like something Reid would do."

"I would not!" He squealed.

JJ went red at the thought. Then Garcia came in. "Ohh, now Morgan you would look hot in that!"

Morgan blushed. "You know what baby girl? You sound like Mrs. Hotchner."

Garcia looked down at him. "Can I see?"

"See what?"

"You in a corset!"

"Baby girl you are a kinky one!" He giggled.

Hotch got up and went to the bathroom and took the black thing off. "Ahh, that's better." He rubbed at his ribs and almost wished that the corset was still on….Almost.

A/N I don't know if I should continue or what. I tried on this one, I really did. I don't have a beta so all the miss spelled words are mine. Thanks for reading, and I don't mean to make fun of the characters. I just can't do a serious story if my life depended on it.


	3. Misfortune

**A/N This part is alot longer cuse I coulten stop. I hope you guys like it. Thanks to Inch239, Torilei, and Meenee126 for your reviews. They mean alot to me. I hope you like this chap. And thanks to my mom. She's my beta. So the mistakes are her's lol. **

The plane ride was quiet…….except for the soft music playing in the background. Reid had placed classical in the CD player. Morgan was thinking of putting reggae on.

JJ was reading the file. "The girl is around 25, medium height, long dark hair and pretty blue eyes. Friends and neighbors say she is a nice quiet person, except the party nights she has once a month. She has a boyfriend that seems to draw trouble to him. Thus drawing her into it as well. We can't find anything on him, no records."

"Maybe she is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Could be the boyfriend, not her at all." Said Reid.

"Well, knowing women like I do…I'd say she is probably the leader."

They went into the tall glass building looking for Casey Lee nick name 'Spike' hoping he would have any idea where this Meg girl was. They got in an elevator leading up to the 10th floor but the elevator was sort of small and could only hold 4 of them. Reid and Morgan remembered their last encounter with a small elevator. "I'll take the stairs." Reid said as he turned running down the hall looking for the stairs.

"Good Idea, See you guys up there!" Morgan yelled running to catch up with Reid.

Hotch, Gideon, and Emily were riding up on the elevator. There was music playing and Gideon hated the pop song coming out of it. Finally it was at the 8th floor when it came to a halting stop. Gideon grabbed the bars and looked up. "This is bad."

Hotch started to push the buttons but nothing happened, then the lights went off. "Damn it. See what I mean? My day just gets worse and worse. I should have used the stairs with the other guys. But with my luck today I'd probably fall down the stairs!"

Emily looked at him. "Yeah well I know what I'm going to never do again. Ride in an apartment elevator again. Didn't Morgan get stuck in one?" Getting no response she sat down. "Great."

*****

Morgan and Reid made it down the hall. "Hey Reid what Room did Hotch say it was?"

"Room 28. But I don't see it. Maybe we have the wrong floor."

"Nope, it's right here." Reid took a few deep breaths to slow his racing heart from trying to keep up with Morgan running up the stairs. He pointed to a door with Sponge Bob's face all over it. "Wow, that's a really cool door." He said smiling at it.

"Yeah, I guess."

Morgan knocked on the door and a young man problem in his late 20's with short spikey bleach blond hair and blue eyes came to the door. "What do you want?"

"Hi, Where with the FBI." Reid and Morgan held out there badges. "I'm Agent Morgan and this is Dr. Reid. And where looking for Megan. Do you know her?"

"Of course." Rolling his eyes at Morgan as he chewed on a hot wing with a beer in the other hand. "She's my bird. Why? Did she do somethin knotty?"

"No, we just think she might know something about a couple of murders."

"My Meggie! Never she's the sweetest bird around, always doin great things for me." He said winking and taking a swig of the cold beer.

"Is she here?"

"Nope. She left." He motioned down the hall with the chicken.… "She left a few minutes ago. Wearing a hot mini shirt, and I think she was wearing a shirt…maybe not." He grinned.

Morgan took off down the hall, running. Reid blushed and followed with his funny run. Spike laughed as he let Meg out the door where she took off through the door across from her that was open. Her friend shut the door after she went in. Spike closed his door and went back to his video game. Meg would be fine.

Morgan ran and turned the corner and fell over a trash can and was immediately attacked by an old lady who was taking her trash out and he had knocked it all over the floor. She hit him with the now empty trash can and kicked him. "Blast it you youngin…no manners, running in the hall…assaulting an old lady!!!" She swings a bony fist at him, and Morgan burst into laughter rolling away.

Reid stopped and looked down at him. "Are you ok?" He reached down to help him up.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He said in between laughs. "She's funny."

The old lady raised her small fist. "I'll show you funny!"

Reid held his hands up. "Hey, hey stop. We're with the FBI." Hoping that would stop her from hitting Morgan.

"I don't give a broken peanut! Run me over. I'll show you." She charged at them, but they took off. "Come back here!" She stopped a few feet then stopped out of breath. "Pew. I'll have to get them later." She went back to her room leaving the trash spread out in the hall to take her afternoon nap before General hospital came on. She had to see if Sonny got caught for killing Claudia. She hoped not for he was just so handsome.

They stopped in front of the elevator door and pushed the button.

*****

The elevator finally started to move. "Finally!" Emily said jumping up in the air. "It feels like we've been in here forever!"

The door opened and Hotch ran out without thought and ran straight into Reid, knocking him into the wall and onto the floor. "Ops. I'm so sorry Reid."

"It's ok." Looking up at him. "Help me up?"

Hotch reached down and took Reid's hand pulling him up. But in the process hurting his ribs again, grabbing his ribs he said. "Let's take the stairs."

Morgan looked at him. "Did you guys get stuck?...Sucks doesn't it?" He walked off towards the stairs.

They were half way down the stairs and Morgan was in front with Reid close behind. Gideon was following Hotch too close and Hotch saw this. "What? You need something?"

"Just making sure you don't fall down the stairs and hurt yourself more." Right after the words left his lips he heard a yell, looked down just in time to see Reid slip on something and go down hard.

"Ahhh!" Reid fell on his butt and fell into Morgan almost taking him down with him. "Ow." He rolled over and grabbed his butt and leg. "Aug."

Hotch and Gideon ran down and Hotch reached down to Help Reid up when he touched him his got a shock. "Static electricity, after rubbing my shoes on the carpet upstairs, it built up, making my hair rise and you touched..." Reid said.

"No science lesson Reid." Said Morgan.

Hotch stood back bit then slipped on something and slid backwards almost falling down the stairs if not for Gideon grabbing him. "Whoo! Told you I'm cursed! Thanks Jason."

Gideon nodded. "Let's just get out of here." He grabbed Hotch's jacket and helped him down the rest of the stairs. Morgan half carried Reid while Emily stayed far away from all of them.

Gideon went first through the revolving door but before he got all the way in his jacket got stuck and the door came around and clamped onto his fingers. "Ahhhh!!"

Hotch grabbed the door and pulled on it. "Morgan! Help me!"

Morgan helped Reid sit on a bench and ran outside through the other door and pushed on the door. Another scream came from poor Gideon and Hotch yelled out. "The other way!"

Morgan did and together they got it loose enough for Gideon to get his fingers out but when they let go it ripped his jacket. Gideon got out and had tears in his eyes. "Hospital. Please."

Hotch helped him in their SUV while Morgan got Reid. Hotch got behind the wheel, hoping his run with bad luck was at an end. He started it up and drove off.

******

When they got there they waited for what seemed like forever. People sneezing all over the place, some wearing masks and nurses rushing about. One man sat next to Hotch holding a bloody bandage over the large cut in his pinky. Hotch tried not to breathe the air, afraid he would catch the swine flu. He felt dizzy as he saw spots, until Reid poked him in the ribs with his elbow. "Hotch, oh sorry. Want some coffee?"

"No thanks!" His words came out in a woosh, as he took a breath. "Damn it Reid…" He got up and headed for the door and fresh air…and was stopped when a nurse came out.

"Family of Jason Gideon?"

Hotch stood up. "I'm his partner." The look she gave him was creepy. "Not that kind of partner. We're work for the FBI."

She nodded. "Sorry. It's just the way you said it." She smiled but had no teeth. "Well he broke three of his fingers." She held up her hand and showed them which ones. "So he has a nice cast." She smiled and left.

"She forgot to tell us if he can come with us or not." Morgan didn't like her for some reason.

Hotch looked at Reid. "Do you want to go and see if you broke anything? Or see if you can have some painkillers?"

He shook his head. "No, but you should. Just to make sure you didn't hurt your ribs more."

Then Gideon came in. "Can we leave?" Looking around with big eyes. "There is this crazy Doctor that keeps asking me if she can take me out."

Morgan laughed. "Well why not? Is she a cutie?"

"See for yourself!"

He ran to the bathroom and a small 4 foot something came in. With shoulder length brown hair and big blue eyes she was as round as she was tall. Like a torpedo her eyes locked on Reid. "Hello. Have any of you seen a handsome tall man go by?"

They all shook their heads. Then she turned to Reid. "Wow! Baby you are a handsome one! Nice and young, just the way I like em! What are you around 17?" She started to walk towards him but Hotch got up and was about to stand in the way but his foot got caught on the lamp's cord and tripped him. He laid there holding his ribs rolling back in forth.

The round butterball nurse looked down at him. "I'll go get help!" With one last look and a wink at Reid she hobbled off.

Hotch got up still holding his ribs. "Let's get out of here. Please?"

Morgan helped him stand. "But what about your ribs?"

"I'll be fine." They half walked half ran down the hall. Morgan stopping at the bathroom to get Gideon. They made it back to the police station and went over the profile once more.

**A/N Please hit the review button. There like food to me. I'll give you a lollypop if you do. :) Should I keep going?**


	4. Death

A/N I hope you people really like this part. I tried, I know it's dumb and crazy. I would like to thank Torilei for sticking with this crazy story and for being her.

They arrived at the station and J.J came up to them. "We got a phone call an hour ago. It was a women claiming that her boyfriend was taken in a parking lot while they were going home from shopping last night. She said that someone pushed her into a car and then did something to her boyfriend. She saw 3 people. One of them she knew from a restaurant called 'Piggy's grease'; she said she's the manager."

"Man, why would anyone want to eat at a place called that? Yuck." Everyone looked at Morgan in agreement.

Garcia came in. "Sounds good to me!" They all gave her a disbelieving look. "What? You did say french-fries right?"

"Ok let's go to the restaurant."

* * *

They went in and saw a rather large but cheerful woman in a hot pink dress singing along to whatever song was playing on the radio. Morgan walked up to her with a big smile. "Excuse me ma'am. But I was wondering if the manager is here?"

"Well Hun. I'm one. What can I do for you? Owner special today is pie, nice juicy blueberry."

"No thank you. Where were you yesterday, from 8pm to 11pm?"

"Well I was here of course! Well I was till 10. Then I went home to my dog."

"Do you have an alibi?"

"Well yes. Ask the customers that come at that time. They're here every night. And my dog can't talk yet so. Anything else my dear?"

"Is there another manager?"

"Well yes. Laverne. She's such a sweet girl. Love her!"

"Can you give me her address?"

"Sure." She went in the back then came back and handed him some paper. "You want some pie to go?"

Morgan smiled. "I would love some." But then Hotch came over and patted his shoulder.

"Let's go."

"Sorry. Maybe later."

Laverne was sleeping on her nice yellow love seat when there was a loud knock on the door. So loud that she jumped up and fell off and onto the hard dirty carpet. "Son of a…" She got off the floor and stormed to the door and swinging it open. "Yea?"

"HI miss. We're with the…"

"I know what you are. What do you want?" She looked Hotchner up and down. "Wow. Ya know what? You sure are an eye full." Licking her lips as she looked into his eyes. "Too bad your eyes are not as cute." Her thick southern accent running a mile a minute.

Hotch looked down at the somewhat small lady. "We heard from someone that you were seen at a crime scene."

"Well, you heard wrong suggah! I don't make no trouble. But if you're lookin for some I'll give it!" She smacked her big plump pink lips.

Morgan tried not to laugh thinking of all the crazy women that seemed to be in this town. "Well do you have an alibi for the third of this month ma'am?"

"Yes I do. I was at work. Over at that place I forget what it's called but I do know it next door to a pet store. Ya'll should see the fuzzy things they have over there!"

"Well do you happen to have the phone number of your boss?"

She took one look at Reid and her upper lip curled. "Yuck! You are a geeky one aint ya? Poor boy. No I don't. You gotta go get it yourself!" She looked back at Hotch and saw the dirty look he was giving her. "Did I do somethin?" She spun her long red curls in her fingers.

Morgan saw the tension growing. "If we have any more questions well be back." They turned to leave and she watched Hotch's behind.

When they were gone she shut the door and went to her bedroom closet. She took out a rather large box and started to take out some stuff. "O-yeah. They're getting too close for my liking."

* * *

They pulled up at the hospital the three of them got out while Gideon stayed to keep an eye out on the car. They spotted Debbie in one of the halls. She was talking to herself since no one else was around. A very animated conversation it was, as she waved her hands around smiling as she talked.

"Excuse me Miss…"

Debbie turned towards them, and she moved over to Reid. "Would you like to go home with me? I think we could get along well together."

She smiled up at him, her blue eyes twinkling before she turned around and glared at Hotch. "Wait your turn! I don't mind you grabbing my butt, but later. I'm busy right now."

Morgan began to laugh, as Hotch turned red and his mouth opened. "I never touched you, stupid woman!"

Morgan sat down in a chair and doubled over as he looked at Reid and Hotch.

Debbie turned to Reid, and put her hand on his hip. "You are so cute. Give me a kiss honey."

Reid backed up terrified and fell over a cart that a MA was pushing down the hall. There was a clatter as all the stuff on top fell to the floor rolling around and the clang of the cart hit the tiles. Reid looked up and over at Hotch for help.

Hotch moved over towards him as Debbie jumped on Reid, kissing him.

Reid's eyes went wide. "umm!!"

Hotch ran over there and grabbed her by one arm and tugged. "Morgan! Help!" She was too heavy for him to pull off and she was making his ribs hurt even more. And they were just starting to get better.

Morgan got up and pulled on her other arm they got her off and Reid got up and ran like hell out the door to join Gideon. He opened the door and jumped in out of breath.

Gideon looked up from his book. "What happened to you?"

"She attacked me. She kissed me…I think I she might have given me a disease!"

Debbie looked at Morgan. "Aww. You let that nice piece of man get away. Why does Laverne get who she wants and not me? I'm just so hot!" She motioned with her hands at her body. "Ain't I just the hottest thing around?"

Morgan looked down at her. "Well sure you are. Now could you tell us how you know Laverne?"

"Of course! She's my sister! Don't we look alike?"

Morgan shook his head. "If you say so. Now do you know anything about men going missing?"

She looked over at him. "Depends. What's in it for me?"

"Well. Hotchner here will take you out. Cause you know he fancy's you." Hotch gave Morgan a look that could kill.

"Really?!" She reached up and potted Hotch on the cheek. "You and that younger hotty can stop being jealous of each other. I'm woman enough for both of you. Come on sugar, let's go to my place we can…talk there…where's cutey pie?" She grabs his arms trying to drag him towards the door.

"Umm. No thinks. Hey look there's Reid!"

She turns around. "Where?!" She sees no one she turns back to Hotch and he's already out the door. "Aww. He likes to play hard to get! Me likie!" She takes off down the hall.

Hotch makes it to the car. "Gideon drive! She's coming!"

Reid yells out and locks his door and Gideon takes off. As the car turns around Gideon slams on the brakes as Debbie runs out in front of them.

She waves her arms around yelling. "Stop!" Then she walks up to drives side and Gideon rolls the window down. "Here." She hands him a piece of paper. "My number and address. Hope to see you there sweet thing."

Gideon rolled the window up and looked at Hotch. "Does she remind you of someone?"

Just then they heard screeching tires. Turning in his seat he watched it happen.

An ambulance was rushing into the hospital emergency entrance when Debbie ran out in front of them. She was yelling at the SUV to stop and wasn't watching where she was going. The driver seeing her tried to stop, stomping on the brake but it was no use. The ambulance hit her and they heard the thump of the impact and watched as she flew through the air and landed on the pavement blood pooling around her.

Gideon jumped out and ran back as Morgan ran out of the hospital. Reid got out and ran over as well. Gideon leaned down on one knee next to the broken woman large cut on the side of her face that would have left her disfigured, and her right arm twisted at a unnatural angle was all he saw. Debbie cracked one eye open and looked up at him… "He'll… never know… what he missed, poor… man." Then her eyes closed for the last time. Gideon stood up and looked at Hotch who was standing there as medical personnel ran over but there was nothing that they could do.

Reid stood there not saying anything just looking at her. Hotch looked at Gideon. "Now what?"

Gideon looked at the paper she gave him just before she was killed. "We go to her house."

* * *

They arrived at the nice white picket fenced house it was odd how she lived in such a nice place and her sister lived in a not so nice place. As they went in they saw that all the furnisher was covered in plastic along with the carpet. "Do you think she's going to paint the place?" Morgan said as he went through a desk.

"No, I don't think so. There's no paint around." Reid went into the kitchen and started to go through the draws. He found nothing in them so he moved on to the cabinets, when he got to the middle one he got a shock. When he opened it, it was full of Tupperware and they all fell out burying Reid.

Gideon came in and looked down at him. "Find something?"

Reid got up red in the face and walked down the hall and opened a door. "Guys there's a basement." Hotch went with him and as they reached the bottom they saw chains on the walls and what seemed to be blood all over the walls and floor. As they got a closer look they saw a table with bones on it. Some saw cutter, large hunting knifes, chain saws, and a lot of bob wire. "I think she was the unsub Hotch."

Then Gideon came down stairs. "I found folders all with a man's photos and information about them. Some of them are the ones missing." He handed Reid and Hotch each a folder. "And I found this on a night stand next to a bed." He showed them the frame with the three women on it.

"Then I guess it's time we go talk to Meg and Laverne again. Reid call it in" Hotch went upstairs.

Morgan was looking under a couch with his flash light. "Morgan? Did you find something?"

Morgan jumped and looked at him. "There's something in here. I heard it."

"Like what? A person?"

Morgan looked back down and there was a foot long harry rat, his eyes got big and he jumped straight up and fell back. "AH!" He got up and ran to the other side of the room jumping up and down like a scared girl.

"Morgan. It's just a rat."

"Yeah. A disease infested rat! Look at that thing. It's huge!" Morgan took his gun out.

"Whoa, Morgan. Put that away before you do something stupid." Morgan did and Gideon and Reid came in the room. "Morgan, you stay here and look for more evidence. Reid, Gideon and I are going to Megs and Lavern's."

"Why me? Why not Reid?" Looking around for the large rat.

"Fine. Reid you stay here."

Reid's eyes got big. "What? You said I could go with you." Not liking this house.

Gideon put his hand up to silence them. "I'll stay. I can find stuff better anyway. And I don't feel like talking to them again." He walked off to look in some closets and went he opened one the floor was covered in dead rats.

* * *

They got up the stairs and went around the corner and saw Spike and Meg talking to Laverne.

Hotch drew his gun along with Morgan. "Freeze!"

Spike ran down the hall with Laverne and Meg dropped to the floor.

Morgan and Hotch in pursuit of the two leaving Reid to take care of Meg. "Stay down."

Meg looked up at him. "Please I haven't done anything. I have proof!" Reid put handcuffs on her. "Them aren't necessary you know. I'm not a mean person." With Reid's help she stood up. "Check Laverne's place. Then you'll know it's not us!" Then she whispered. "It's the old lady down the hall. You know she's ferocious."

Reid was trying to lead her down the hall but she fell into Laverne's door opening it. The last thing Reid saw was a bright light.

* * *

Morgan and Hotch were catching up to them when Spike went down one hallway and Laverne down another. Hotch followed Laverne down a hall and down the stairs again. Once he got outside he lost sight of her. He began to cross the street when he heard screeching and a crowd of people scream. He turned to see a car coming right at him.

Morgan tuned a corner and found Spike stopped out of breath. He jumped in the air and tacked Spike to the ground hard. "You made a big mistake man!" He slapped the handcuffs on and rufley pulled him up just as the floor shook and smoke felled the hall. "What the..?" Then it downed on him…Reid.

Morgan runs off leaving Spike sitting there who was free of the handcuffs within seconds. He smiled and ran off. Outside he looked around in hopes of catching up with sweet Meg. He kept to the wall and ran off in the opposite direction from the cops. Hurrying along he saw Meg and yelled at her and she turned and smiled at him as he rushed towards her. He was the only one who saw the ghost, who was motioning to him to join her. He never saw the computer monitor that came down on his head from the fourth floor apartment. Meg was horrified as she watched it crush her lovers head. Then she saw him standing beside her, they smiled at each other and walked off into the happily ever darkness.

A/N Please review. Reviews are like fuel that keeps writers writhing. And my tank is empty. Please if you read it review it. I love them. I hate how I write I know I'm bad, and last chapter was a disappointment for me and obviously for everyone else. I'm hungry for some people's feedbacks. So should I kill Reid and Hotch? Anyone want them alive?


	5. Bad luck

A/N Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter. Sorry it took me so long to update. Sorry for any miss spelled words.

In the borrowed office that the local police had offered to the team J.J was sitting at a desk looking over the profiles of the unsubs. The sun was shining brightly into the window onto the desk, the light making it hard to read the papers in front of her. They had all been completely off. They were supposed to be men and a group of them not three. But then her tummy growled at her and she got up and walked down the hall to get a snack from a machine she saw earlier that morning. She stopped and looked at the four snack machines and what each one offered, did she want hot chocolate, soup, or just junk food. Then she moved over to the one with chips and candy bars in it. She put one dollar in it and punched in the number for a bag of healthy chips. But it got stuck half way down. "Darn."

She pushed her arm up against the machine and started to shake it. She could hear Reid's voice in her head trying to explain how many deaths there are worldwide with people getting crushed by enraged people shaking snack machines. But at the moment she didn't care but the chips didn't budge, so she got down onto her knees on the dark green carpet, opened the flap, and flapped it back in fourth. When that didn't work she put her arm in it and reached as far as her arm could go. "Come on, come on…almost there…almost…got cha!" Her long finger nail moved it just enough to get it free. But when she tried to pull her arm out she found that her bracelet was around one of the spirals. "You got to be kidding me!"

There she was….stuck. She tried to get her bracelet free but it was hooked and she didn't want to break it. "At least I got my chips." Someone walked by but their face was buried in a folder and they didn't see her. When she saw no one for a while she yelled. "Help! Someone help me please! I'm stuck!"

………………

Morgan took off running back down the hall looking for any sigh of his friend. "Reid!" The Smokey hall was starting to clear and the first thing Morgan saw was blood all over the wall across from the door. He came to a sudden stop along with his heart for a moment. Morgan just hoped it wasn't Reid's, he looked on the floor and there was Reid leaning against the wall, limp. He rushed over to his side and turned him over to get a better look. Reid had a cut just above his left eyebrow and his shoes were gone the only thing covering his feet were the dirty mix match socks. Morgan lightly patted his cheek. "Reid. Wake up, we have to leave. Come on kid." He shook him and Reid finally opened his eyes and looked up at him with sad brown eyes. He looked at the broken doorway and under the door now on the floor was a hand, he felt sorry for her. But then he noticed that the apartment was on fire. "O-no." He began to slide over to the side.

"What hit me?"

"A bomb. Come one we have to go. The building's on fire." Morgan put one arm across Reid's back and pushed him into a sitting position. "Let's get you to a hospital. On three. Ready?" On two he pulled himself and Reid up and they slowly started to walk down the hall.

……….

Hotch quickly got out of the way as the speeding car zoomed by him. "Idiot!" He picked up his sunglasses that had fallen on the street and put them back on noticing the small scratch.

Hotch heard another set of brakes and turned around and saw a group of people standing over someone lying on the ground near the apartment building. He went over to see who it was and down on the ground was Meg's boyfriend.

Someone came running out of the building yelling "Fire! Call 911!"

Hotch looked up and sure enough there was smoke coming from one of the windows. And it looked like the floor he left his men on. He took a deep breath and ran back into the building and ran up the stairs and got half way up when he saw Morgan and Reid slowly making their way down the stairs. "What happened?"

Morgan looked down at him. "I think a bomb went off in that room. We need to get to a hospital."

Hotch nodded and they walked down the stairs.

……..

Reid was sitting on the exam table holding a piece of cloth to his head in an attempt to stop the bleeding. Hotch stood by the table a concerned look on his face as he waited. He was worried that Reid might faint as he was more pale than usual.

The nurse came in with a small tray and put it down on the table and lifted a needle filled with some liquid. Reid looked up and saw the huge needle and began to weave and he felt faint, as Hotch grabbed him. The nurse smiled and glanced at the older dark haired man. She reached and grabbed his head gently and moved towards him with the needle, and Reid tried to back up. The needle got bigger and bigger as it got closer. "No!"

"Reid, it's not that bad, close your eyes."

Reid just fell back on the table… "No, it's huge!"

"Reid, it's okay. I've had it done, it's better than getting sewn up without it."

Reid closed his eyes and clutched the sides of the table, he was shaking. The nurse injected him and then went to put it in the sharps container. She glanced at her watch and waited as Hutch put his hand on Reid's shoulder.

Ten minutes later the two walked out of the ER and found the others waiting for them.

Morgan moved over to Reid and smiled. "How are ya kid? Want to go out for lunch? I'll buy? We can all go eat."

"Gideon and I have to go do some work, you two go. We'll catch you later." The two older men walked away leaving the younger ones there. They passed some nurses and Morgan turned to watch then walk by with a big smile on his face.

Hotch was for sure that they were close to cracking this case and yet they were so far away. They needed to find Laverne, they were for sure that she was one of the unsubs. And it didn't help that it had started to snow the night before. Reid and Morgan where walking side by side in the snow. "Man, the snow just keeps coming down harder and harder." Morgan said in an annoyed voice. He hated the snow and it made him mad that the weatherman said that it was going to be a nice day out today.

"Well I like it." Just as he stepped off the curb to cross the street his foot slipped on black ice and he went down hard on his back. "Ah."

Morgan looked down at him trying to hold a laugh in. "You alright kid?" He offered him a hand and Reid took it.

"No. Now my back hurts." He got up and started to rub at his back. Man why do all the bad things have to happen to him?

Morgan helped him stand and they walked across the street. "You know Reid, you have more accidents that anyone I know. And just when I thought Hotch was catching up to you too with all the accidents he's been having. Man, you should have seen the splat you did. Man it was so priceless. Wish I had a camr….AH!"

Reid looked back at Morgan but he was nowhere to be seen. "Morgan?" But there was a hole in the ground. Reid bent down and looked in the pitch black hole. "Morgan?"

Morgan opened his eyes and groaned. "What the hell?" He looked around and saw dirty walls slick floors and dirty water. "O god! Am I in a sewer?!" He slowly got up and saw a ladder leading up to the top where he saw Reid looking down at him. "I can't believe I just fell in a sewer! This sucks." He sniffed himself. "Feww. I stink." Then he saw it. Their sitting across from him on the sickening floor was a big fat hairy dirty rat. "Ah!" He jumped clean over it and then did a little dance and shivered then hurried up the ladder and out into the freedom.

Reid looked at him with big eyes. " What?"

Morgan was slightly embarrassed. "Nothing. I thought I saw something."

"What?" But the look on Morgan's face told him what he needed to know. "It was a rat wasn't it?"

"No…It was a…a..ummm" He had to answer that would make since. "I don't know, but it wasn't a rat."

"Yeah sure it wasn't. Whatever you say."

"Be quite kid. Lets drop buy the Hotel. I need to change."

"Yes you do. You stink." Smiling while he said it Morgan gave him a dirty look.

They walked to the Hotel with Reid teasing Morgan the whole way there. Morgan washed up and bandaged a cut on his arm he came out of the bathroom and went into the hall to get Reid. But as he tried to close his door he looked away and shut the door on his finger. "Ow! Shit!" He kneeled down and held his hand.

Reid came running to his side. "What happened?" Looking down at him. "You ok?" He put a hand on his shoulder and Morgan moaned.

"I fucked up my finger. The door hates me." He's eyes started to water. "Ah go away. I don't want to go anywhere."

"But I thought we were going to eat."

Morgan shook his head and said "Come back in twenty minutes." then got up and went in his room and shut his door.

…….

Hotch looked at Gideon. "Call Garcia and tell her to look up a Laverne that lives in that apartment building and, and get the info to J.J. And look up that Meg one too. I think her last name was west or something."

Gideon nodded and pulled out his phone.

…..

Garcia got the files together and went to find J.J. As she was walking down the hall she heard a familiar voice calling for help. She jogged down the hall and found her young friend on the floor with her arm inside the machine. "J.J. What happened? Are you stuck?"

"Yes, help me, I can't get my arm free. Stupid machine ate it."

Garcia pulled out a nail file and moved towards the machine.

"That's not going to help."

"How do we know unless I try it? I've done this kind of thing before." She began to work on the lock, hoping to open it.

"Go get some butter, oil or something."

Garcia looked at her and put began to file her nails as she walked off.

JJ sat there on the stained carpet, and took a deep breath and wished she hadn't. Next to the machine was a trash can, and the foul smell coming from it she wanted to get away from it. She turned her head away and saw more feet coming. "Help!"

The feet stopped next to her. "Thief! How dare you try to steal in the police station! We might not be a big city one but we are important!"

JJ looked up into a slightly chunky sized woman with glasses with hair styled with lots of hairspray and a bow in it. "I got stuck."

"Serves you right! Shouldn't have let you people come in from the big city. Thieves! You were stealing from our machine. I will have you arrested. Mason! Fred! Get in here, and arrest this woman!" She stomped her foot as two officers hurried in.

"No please. I wasn't! I swear."

**A/N I hope you all liked this little peace. I tried to make this one more sirius. Please Review. It will make my day. I really want to know what you think of it. **


	6. getting serious

Garcia came back with oil and a lock pick. "Just open it, free J.J., lock it back up, and no one will ever know." She said out loud trying to convince herself that it would all work out even thou she didn't know the first thing about picking a lock or how she had managed to open machines before. "If those where my chips I would have broken the glass. Especially if I was hungry." She laughed at her own joke until she saw two male cops trying to pry J.J. free from the Snack machine.

"No, don't! You'll break my arm!" J.J. started kicking out and caught the older of the two officers in the chin.

The fifty something man grabbed his leg and gave her a death glare. "Why you little!" He pulled out his handcuffs and bent down.

J.J. rolled her legs up against herself. "No! I need my legs. Please."

He grabbed at her leg. "I'm only going to cuff it to the machine, no need to worry. Cause once your free I'm going to arrest you for assault on an officer and senor abuse." He smiled at her with his nice and neat looking false teeth.

Garcia came running over waving her arm in the air. "Wait! You can't do that. She's FBI."

"I don't care what she is. This little lady kicked me, how would she like it if she was my age and I kicked her. My legs are fragile."

Then the women looked down at Garcia's hands and saw a set of lock picks. "Are those what I think they are?" Garcia looked down and then back up shaking her head no. "Why you thieving bunch of crooks. What next? A bank! I'm telling the head chef and getting you all off of this case." She stormed off mad.

The younger officer went to call the company in charge of the machines to see if they could come and free the girl.

Garcia was placed in handcuffs and hauled off to a cell, the smile she had before, long gone. Once she was in the cell she looked at the other one that was in there with her. She was muscular built she looked like a man, she even almost had a mustache must be hormones. She was tall maybe even taller that Reid and that was scary. Then she started to come over to her and Garcia backed up. "Please don't hurt me."

The lady laughed and stopped. "I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not as mean as I look. I'm Hunny." She held her hand out and Garcia slowly shook it.

"Penelope."

The cops finely got J.J free and hauled her off to the cell next to Garcia. "Why can't I be put with Garcia?"

The mean old man pulled her along. "Why? So you two can come up with an escape plan? I don't think so." The man was sure they were crooked FBI agents.

Hotch and Gideon got back and went straight to the office looking or J.J. or Garcia to see what they found on the two female subjects. But when they got to the off green room there was the head chef with a sour look on his face. He stood up with his hands crossed over across his chest. "Hotchner, Gideon! I'm going to have to ask you and your men to let this case go. We no longer need your assistance."

Hotch was the first to speak up. "I don't understand."

"Two of your agents were caught stealing from a vending machine." He said sticking his finger in Hotch's chest. "And I don't take to kindly to thieves."

Hotch smacked his hand away and got right in his face. "And I don't take kindly to people accusing my agents of stealing!"

Gideon could see the tension growing between the two men. "Who was it?"

The Chef stopped and looked at him. "What?"

"The two agents. Who are they?" He found it highly unlikely that it was the females of the group, so he thought he was going to say the two men.

"Jennifer Jareau, and Penelope Garcia. They are the most disrespectful girls I've ever meet in my life!" He stepped away from Hotch and stood closer to Gideon. "And may I not forget to mention that Ms. Jareau kicked one of the officers and Ms. Garcia was trying to pick the lock on one of the snack machines!"

Hotch just couldn't believe his ears, this man a head Chef was saying all this stuff about his team. "No I know them. They would never. I want to see proof!"

"Don't you dare yell at me! I'll have you arrested too!"

"O yeah?" Hotch and the Chef where in each other's faces once again. Just as they were about to beat each other up Reid came in and stood next to Gideon.

"How's the case going?"

Hotch and Chef looked at him then back at each other. The Chef stormed out of the room while waving his middle finger in the air as he left. Hotch wanted to go after him but knew it would be unprofessional and he had to make a good example for his team.

"We have been taken of this case." Gideon still couldn't believe it.

"What? Why?" Gideon felled Reid in while Hotch went to get J.J and Pen out of Jail.

And as Hotch was bailing the two girls out, he thought of an idea. "Why didn't I think of this before?" He ran off to the front desk. "Is there cameras in the hallway where the snack machines are?"

The decent looking lady looked up at him and smiled. "Yes there are. They're all over, why?"

"I need you to pull some for me."

"I'm sorry sir but I can't do that." Still smiling she looked deep into his eyes she liked the look of this man. He was just her type.

Hotch smiled at her. "Please?"

That smile just made her melt. "I'll see what I can do. Around what time do you need me to look up?"

"I'm not sure. There will be a young blond haired girl with her arm stuck in a vending machine."

This made her laugh. "Ok sweet thing. You got it!"

She reminded him of Garcia with the way she talked. He then went to go talk to the Chef but when he walked into his office the Chef stood up. "Get the hell out of my office! Now!"

Hotch stood his ground. "No. I can prove my Agents are innocent."

"No you can't. I know the truth. I know a theft when I see one. So don't you go saying…"

Hotch cut him off. "Video tape. If you watch it then you'll know the real truth."

The Chef thought about it. "Fine. But I'm telling you they're guilty."

They watched the tape and by the time they were done the Chef was laughing his ass off. "That has got to be the dumbest girl I have ever seen!" He was silenced by Hotch's killing look. "Ok. Fine." He waved to one of his deputy's to come here. "Go let the two out. Ok. So that Jennifer girl is innocent. But that still doesn't explain why that other one had a lock pick set."

Hotch took a deep breath before speaking. "Well…that's a long story."

**A/N I need to know what you people think. I know it's not that good but I can't get better if you don't tell me what I'm doing wrong. How can I make it better? I'm making it more serious. I know you are reading it. So review. **


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